TheEssenceofHappiness
佚名/Anonymous
IliveinthelandofDisney,Hollywoodandyearroundsun.Youmaythinkpeopleinsuchaglamorous,funfilledplacearehappierthanothers.Ifso,youhavesomemistakesaboutthenatureofhappiness.
Manyintelligentpeoplestillequatehappinesswithfun.Thetruthisthatfunandhappinesshavelittleornothingincommon.Funiswhatweexperienceduringanact.Happinessiswhatweexperienceafteranact.Itisdeeper,moreabidingemotion.
Thewaypeopleclingtothebeliefthatafunfilled,painfreelifeequalshappinessactuallydiminishestheirchancesofeverattainingrealhappiness.Iffunandpleasureareequatedwithhappiness,thenpainmustbeequatedwithunhappiness.Butinfact,theoppositeistrue:Moretimesthannot,thingsthatleadtohappinessinvolvesomepain.
Asaresult,manypeopleavoidtheveryendeavorsthatarethesourceoftreehappiness.Theyfearthepaininevitablybroughtbysuchthingsasmarriage,raisingchildren,professionalachievement,religiouscommitment,civicorcharitablework,andself-improvement.
Askabachelorwhyheresistsmarriageeventhoughhefindsdatingtobelessandlesssatisfying.Ifhe』shonest,hewilltellyouthatheisafraidofmakingacommitment.Forcommitmentisinfactquitepainful.Thesinglelifeisfilledwithfun,adventure,excitement.Marriagehassuchmovement,buttheyarenotitsmostdistinguishingfeatures.
Similarly,coupleswhochoosenottohavechildrenaredecidinginfavorofpainlessfunoverpainfulhappiness.Theycandineoutwhenevertheywant,travelwherevertheywantandsleepaslateastheywant.Coupleswithinfantchildrenareluckytogetawholenight』ssleeporathree-dayvacation.Idon』tknowanyparentswouldchoosethewordfuntodescriberaisingchildren.
Butcoupleswhodecidenottohavechildrenneverexperiencethepleasureofhuggingthemortuckingthemintobedatnight.Theyneverknowthejoyofwatchingachildgrowuporofplayingwithagrandchild.
Buttheseformsoffundonotcontributeinanywaytomyhappiness.Moredifficultendeavors—writing,raisingchildren,creatingdeeprelationshipwithmywife,tryingtodogoodintheworld—willbringmemorehappinessthancaneverbefoundinfun,thatleastpermanentthings.
Understandingandacceptingthattruehappinesshasnothingtodowithfunisoneofthemostliberatingrealizationswecanevercometo.Itliberatestime:nowwecandevotemorehourstoactivitiesthatcangenuinelyincreaseourhappiness.Itliberatesmoney:buyingthatnewcarorthosefancyclothesthatwilldonothingtoincreaseourhappinessnowseemspointless.Anditliberatesusfromenvy:wenowunderstandthatallthoserichandglamorouspeopleweweresosurearehappybecausetheyarealwayshavingsomuchfunactuallymaynotbehappyatall.
Themomentweunderstandthatfundoesnotbringhappiness,webegantoleadourlivesdifferently.Theeffectcanbe,quiteliterally,lifetransforming.
我住在好萊塢迪斯尼樂園，那裡全年陽光普照。你可能認為生活在那麼富於魅力，充滿樂趣的地方，一定比其他地方的人更幸福。如果這麼想，你可能對幸福的真諦有些誤解。
很多聰明的人仍將幸福等同於樂趣。其實，樂趣和幸福的共同之處極少，或者說根本就沒有。樂趣是行為過程中的感受，而幸福是我們行為過後的感受，它是一種更為深刻、持久的感情。
人們堅信充滿歡樂，遠離痛苦的生活方式就等於幸福。實際上，這樣反而減少了他們獲得真正幸福的機會。如果歡樂和愉快等同幸福，那痛苦就等同不幸。其實恰恰相反，多數情況下，能帶來幸福的事物往往包含諸多痛苦。
所以說，許多人所逃避的艱難困苦恰恰是真正幸福的源泉。這些人害怕那些必定會帶來痛苦的事情，如結婚、撫養子女、提高專業技能、承擔宗教義務、社會服務或慈善事業，提升自我等。
儘管一個單身者對約會越來越不感興趣，但當你問他為什麼還不想結婚時，如果他很誠實，就會告訴你，他怕承擔責任。因為承擔責任確實是一件痛苦的事情。獨身生活充滿著樂趣、冒險和激情。婚姻雖也有如此體驗，卻大為遜色。
同樣，選擇不要孩子的夫妻都有一種觀點，即寧可要不痛苦的歡樂，也不要痛苦的幸福。他們可以隨時出去吃飯、旅遊，想睡到多晚就睡多晚。而有孩子的夫妻，睡上一整晚，或有三天假期，算是幸運的了。我想，任何夫婦都不會用「樂趣」這個詞來形容撫養孩子。
但是，不要孩子的夫婦永遠也體會不到，擁抱孩子或晚上給孩子掖好被子時的愉悅。他們永遠不知道，看著孩子長大或者逗弄兒孫的樂趣。
然而，這些形式的樂趣在任何意義上都稱不上是我所謂的幸福。寫作、撫養孩子、增進與妻子的感情、為社會做些善事——這些給我帶來的幸福遠比娛樂帶來的樂趣要多。要知道，娛樂是轉瞬即逝的。
瞭解並接受真正的幸福與娛樂毫不相干，我們就能獲得最大限度的解放。它解放了時間：現在我們能集中更多的時間去從事那些能帶給我們真正幸福的活動；它解放了金錢；買一輛新車或一些時尚的衣物並不能增加我們的幸福；它把我們從嫉妒中解放出來：我們懂得，那些曾被我們確信幸福的富豪權貴們，只不過是享受了太多的娛樂，事實上或許毫無幸福可言。
我們如果懂得娛樂並不帶來幸福，就會開始用不同的方式生活。其效果將是人生真正的轉折點。
1.Manyintelligentpeopleequatehappinesswithfun.Thetruthisthatfunandhappinesshavelittleorincommon.iswhatweexperienceduringanact.Happinessiswhatweexperienceanact.Itisdeeper,moreabidingemotion.
2.Asaresult,manypeopleavoidtheendeavorsthatarethesourceoftreehappiness.Theythepaininevitablybroughtbysuchthingsasmarriage,raising,professionalachievement,religiouscommitment,civicorcharitable,andself-improvement.
1.人們堅信充滿歡樂，遠離痛苦的生活方式就等於幸福。
2.他們永遠不知道，看著孩子長大或者逗弄兒孫的樂趣。
3.瞭解並接受真正的幸福與娛樂毫不相干，我們就能獲得最大限度的解放。
1.Askabachelorwhyheresistsmarriageeventhoughhefindsdatingtobelessandlesssatisfying.
eventhough：即使；雖然
2.Similarly,coupleswhochoosenottohavechildrenaredecidinginfavorofpainlessfunoverpainfulhappiness.
infavorof：有利於；支持；贊同